TQ for a visit. On my blog page you will often read about me just blurting out whatever is on my mind. I enjoy funny jokes ...lol ... just to laugh You will read a lot of what I find to be funny,cute, thought provoking etc etc. Feel free to comment and vote on my posts. Also, I'd like it if you'd just say whats on your mind when posting ... nothing will offend me. TQ again for stopping by.
These days it is hard to extract loyalty from a man, let alone a monument. Even if a man promises to build a monument, he would end up borrowing money from his wife and scoot.
Would a wife ever build such a monument for her husband, would she spend so much time, efforts n money? Would she go as far as cutting the limbs to avoid duplication? Hell no
God was just about done creating humans, but he had two parts left over.He couldn't decide how to split between Adam n Eve , so he thought , He might just as well ask them , He told one of the things he had left was a thing that would allow the owner to pee while standing up,it’s a very handy thing, God told them ,and I was wondering if either one of you had a preference for it.
Well Adam jumped up n down n begged God to please give that to me I‘d love to be able to do that. It seems like the sort of thing a man should have. Please Pleeeeeeasee give it to me, on n on he went, like an excited little boy.
Eve just smiled n told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly he could have it, so God gave Adam the thing that allowed him to pee standing up,Adam was so excited he just started whizzing all over the place – first on the side of a rock, then he wrote his name in the sand and he tried to see if he could hit a stump 10 feet away —Laughing with delight all the while
God n Eve watched him with amusement and God said to Eve, well, I guess you’re kind of stuck with the last thing I have left. What’s it called asked eve, BRAINS said God
LOL – send this to yr friends n let them the truth be known
In our young days as kids we used to climb trees with the help of trunk and branches to pluck the fruits >>>>>>>>> and to remove the dirt n mud from our bodies our elders and parents herded us irrespective of gender for a bath at one go in the large bathroom at our native place.
Now also we as adults do the same in order to pluck the fruits of our labor, we reach our towering work places with the help of stairs n lifts
Though the luxury of a bath together is a matter of choice. LOL
A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of Rs.50,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.
The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the Rs.50,000. She gives him back his Rs.50,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given.
Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.
Men are like that, you know.
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on ALZHEIMER'S RESEARCH. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
If you don't send this to your friends right away there will be fewer people laughing in the world and thinking as to where we all are heading.
Two young casino dealers were awaiting their players one evening…..
A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty-thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said,] I hope you guys don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely naked!!!." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" >>Then she hollered…"YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. She then picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed. >>The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" >The other answered, "I don't know I thought YOU were watching!"
Moral: Not all blonde's are dumb, but all men are men. lol
A great note for all to read it will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking _________________________________________________ Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.
Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.
As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene. One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.
Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind 's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. Days and weeks passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.
He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.
It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.
She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you." Epilogue: There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy. "Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present." The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on. Do not keep this letter. Just forward it to your friends to whom you wish blessings.
Its a sad day for girls in mumbai as has been reported that Muslim girls are not only discouraged from pursuing an education but they and their parents are being targeted by fanatics with verbal and physical abuse.
Friends please raise your voices in any forum so as to lend a moral support to the victims
I often forget where I have kept my things. I would ask my live in if he knew. It got to a point where he would respond with, “If it were up yr butt, you would know.”
I thought that was very insensitive. One day I just forgot to return to his pad and have never seen him since. When he calls my friends n family to ask where I am, they tell him "If she were up yr butt, you would know.”
In a one day international ( ODI ) cricket match the bowler is allowed to bowl only 10 overs i.e. 60 balls, so the same rule should apply to batsmen also or till they are not declared out so as to bring in a parity and allow the lower order batsmen to settle down and show their talents, further this will definitely speed up the game
Lovers of the game irrespective of gender are expected to post their views
