Jul 5, 2008 3:08 am Mood: contemplative, 242 Views
Have you ever thought How the world might look in the eyes of A dog on the street?
The dog perhaps would not bother About the world much He would know the world By the leftovers in the garbage In sunnier days he may even Feel for his bitch He knows that a hit Would hurt him bad And a car can run him over Rarely he could meet a kind soul Who would whistle at him His luckiest day could be When someone throws him food He wouldn’t care Where he would lie When he dies
This is what the dog could think There is no way he knows much better If he did, he wouldn’t be on the road He wouldn’t be Man’s slave
But you know that The world is much more than What it is in a dog’s view For a Man the world is much bigger Though he is much similar to the dog, In many ways. There are things where he differs
For one thing we know that A Man’s world is a lot more and better Than that of the street dog The man rides in a car That can run over a dog The Man has tamed so many things Of the God’s world Including the dog
Have you ever thought That if the dog’s world is limited to his own view The Man’s world also is limited likewise? Is it not possible that Both know to the level They are capable of knowing The world beyond their thoughts is not for them Just because they have not seen them If they did, they did not understand them
How can I be proud that I am a Man At the pinnacle of knowledge When I am not sure Where do I stand?
For all my intelligence For all my knowledge For all my strength And for all my comforts I am still ignorant I am ignorant of things Which are beyond my perception I do try to know them In fact, I could see through the door For a little distance But I must know that What I know is nothing In front of the unknown
Tell me friends, Does the dog know about the war in Iraq? Does he know about this blog? Ignorance of Man too is Of this magnitude Our pride is only our limitation Our humility could be a bit better But that too is tutored by our thoughts The humblest could Still be proud of his humility
So friends, just remember That we are just dust In front of the bigger dust For a smaller matter We are only a bit bigger None knows how big is big And how small is small Are the biggest and the smallest one? We may ask how it is possible? But I do not know As I can perceive neither
To see is to believe This is Man’s parameter Therefore I do not believe That which I do not see Can I believe without seeing I tend to doubt I do not trust other’s intelligence In this matter
Therefore, it is possible that The world is much more than That meets my eye My eyes are small And are ordained to see the limited I do not have the tools to see Things which are beyond Perhaps I may not be able to see them With my senses If I can perceive them Through others’??! Who are they? Are there Men capable enough? I do not know. I feel that Men too are limited to a limit Like the humble dog has his. We can strain beyond this limit With not much result.
Here I must confess Of a little anomaly My thoughts run Within limitations of Men How can I think about my thoughts Other than through my thoughts?.
I won’t ask to meet you I won’t ask you to meet me For I do not need these mundane bondings I am one with you and you are in me The distance is of no import In that I am unable to meet you But I know that, That you do not meet me is The strength of my love for you. For, when I meet you I may not look at you In your resplendent glory of love I may be looking at lesser things Which are more to senses And can even cloud my spirit And I may and will love you less Nearness will dilute my love Familiarity will breed contempt I will not sully you With my sinful presence Let us not give a name to this nearness For a name will make you small Who is not separate from me. I won’t want to see myself small There were times when I thought I lost you In that loss I have gained you I have you here in me How can you be away when I am alive? I can say that I lust you and long for you I can say that I want to talk to you And have you by my side I can say that I want you to give me my children I can praise your beauty and intelligence I can say that my thoughts of you are more beautiful Than those of Himself But I know that I would be lying I would be lying because I say these to please you When I want to please you, I want something back, I do not love you when I want from you And you hope for the same in return My thought of you in this way Have always been of lust. Lust cannot become love Just as you cannot make gold from coal All my claims of love have been false I cannot love you till the end of universe I cannot love you like I do my God I cannot love you like I love my life I cannot die for you I will not put adjectives before my love I will not paint my love with colours Of the rainbow or of the hills And vast valleys where flowers bloom These are sure, things of beauty But I can love you beyond these For when I am in love, I can only be in love My love for myself is not separate from my love for you. I am in love with myself.
Jul 3, 2008 7:54 am Mood: an ode to mid summer rain, 236 Views
The unfolding of the day is always hopeful The scant light and gloom do not fail To bring in the hope of emerging light From the dark womb of night comes a day full bright
And the doors of life swing open at the crack of the dawn Dreams and hopes born in the dark of the night Are given a name in the morn For it is here, many a fancy takes to real flight
In the dead of the dark night I too had a vision The like of which I had never seen Neither before in the night nor in the future’s fold Now the past has fled and the future is on hold
While I do not look far upon the future’s length I cannot help seeing into the dark night’s depth And there was a day before that night When I lived all plain, but for a moment
Indeed a solemn a moment was that Revealed to me like the Divine Song Neither by sound nor fury nor serenade too fast But by silence, patience and many a pause long
Then there was neither day nor night The very life was in the serene moment, held tight It didn’t matter if the next day was bright Or the past on the day, was void of any light
Three hot summers and three seasons of rain Made Me from nothing and yet I was in pain The truth came to me when I was as well vain It came in soundless whispers and She was plain
She laughed less, but in her eyes ever lingered a smile She never darted, but her motion elegant did me beguile We spoke less and less and, the silences were dear We never held hands but she ever touched clear
That was a dream that wouldn’t last but as a dream For the dreams are of the stuff that make a stream When the sun climbs up and scorches the terrain The stream vanishes as a cloud, to come back as a rain
And this dream did not come back as rain for long Long has been thirty years and so is my song Yesterday, in the sullen sky rumbled a thunder for long A chill drop touched my bosom and I could not be wrong
Years of clog was swept away in the mighty rain A faint form, a child’s voice, took me years behind Again, my heart took it for a dark night’s dream all in vain Yet, the voice came from far and brought many a word kind
Beneath the skin and burnt visage, I remained the same I The lost dream ever touched me softer than a child’s breath, I listened to my lessons over the dreary years that passed by, Be human, love and be loved before the slap of thy death.
She was kind, kinder than what is deserved by me She was bright, brighter than many around me She was strong, stronger than most known to me But She dithered, and that hurt her and hurt me.
In her little tender heart, she too has a little closet Where she keeps her lost moments and a soft secret A pain, a pleasure, waft of wind, a sweet note of music Which comes back to her often as an apparition, mystique
And She has a fear that her pain may recur And in the process of which I may suffer And she is kind and caring, but shuns me for fear That the pains are intense while parting from those near.
Still she comes to me with the first rays of a morning sun With soothing balms for my wrinkled brow I talk to her in my gratitude and a break from my listless run She turns and takes to flight, like a startled sparrow.
For me this is a friendship that was never before there I am aware my lost love shall never be here Again and again the spring does not come in a year In my year, my moment has fled, beyond the edge and far.
I know love and friends do not tumble from the sky Like a vast plain viewed from the top of a mountain high And a rainbow holding the ends of the endless sky Love binds and parts to test the strength of hearts’ sigh
Over my listless years, I have seen men and women crumble For want of a friend, philosopher and a guide humble Behind this unseen face and a child’s voice dear I have seen my star angel, singular, bright and clear
Love and friendship are heaven’s daughters with similar grace In the covenants of Man, friendship, scarce finds a place Mothers, brothers, spouses, all are products of staid agreements Unadorned, a friend is afar and aloof, devoid of embellishments
My friend came nearer, like a comet’s visit in a thousand years She set my path ablaze with a million hopes and steamy tears She was not seeking me, but hither she came on her errand ablaze And here she is gone to her friends across oceans and haze
Look for a friend outside of me, often my friend tells For I am not the one that set free your heart’s flood gates You opened the gates for yourself and I didn’t ring the bells You only heard the music of your heart, when sadness abates
Yet again she comes to me with a kind word Yet again she passes me a message to look forward Yet again she retorts and says she would never come any near And I am not sure what it is, that is the cause of her fear
And here I stand in the middle of a desert Where I roamed by chance in search of an oasis large To rest before I start after quenching my thirst Alas, I am in doubt, if what I see is a pool or a mirage.
I will wander from the woods and deserts into the unknown For my heart and soul have all along been all alone I will walk the lanes, streets, by lanes of the city and plains Till the body falls away and the soul escapes from all the pains.
Or if you look closely, even a coward is brave It takes much courage to run away To undo the bonds, by stepping into the grave And to vanish into thin air or to lands far away
But, here I remember the lines of a lovely verse by Frost How did he know that one day I will need them most? The woods are lovely, dark, and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.
On this bend I did pause for another blessed moment in my languid travel To breath, to rest, to quench my thirst and at nature’s delight to marvel For here She looked up, to smile at me and wave a silent hand Not from near, not from far, but from the other side of the river’s’ bend
And yet there are many rains to come and many suns will rise And my friend may turn and come back with a word kind I may wait till the very end to speak to her and hear her voice And I may meet her in the winter’s last evening, after the season’s grind
Do not see any cowardice in the long and sad song The poem is written to put my hopes as well bright and long I promise to walk till my limbs are tired, till the very end To the end of the beginnings, middle and this, the last bend
Sometimes at mid noon And at midnight I cry out in anguish My friends never know what ails me My wife’s sure that I am spooked My children are scared of me But no one knows what’s wrong with me.
For it is at midnight and mid noon That my constant companion for the day and night Vanishes, not to be seen He follows me everywhere Even where my friends cannot He eats, drinks and walks with me He sleeps with me and wakes up by my side.
Oh yes, he is my shadow My constant trailer My outline in different scales and shapes Filled with darkness of different hue Often he is so small that I cannot see him And at times he is so big that I see only a part of him
He is real funny too He changes his dark shade a hundred times His outline twists and twirls He is diagonal and sometimes only a line Often when I know he is there, He is only a half, the other Half cut by brilliance, his foe
To begin with I never saw him I remember my friends telling me Not to look at my shadow in the night Who they told me is only evil Then I did tricks with my shadow I moved my hands and fingers To make funny shades on the wall
I was beginning to notice my companion Often he plays pranks on me My friends sometimes call me handsome My wife said that often, that was before I married her And here, this dark ruffian following me Dances in ugly shapes and hideous silhouette And calls me ugly and shapeless and dark
And I tried to become handsome in the eyes of all And in the outlines of my shadow. I ate only once a day and went to a gym I dyed my hair, and grew a Bulganin beard I cut my clothes at a fashionable angle And got my shoes made to order I sprayed a perfume sold by a footballer’s wife
My wife said that my hair looked younger My friends said that my beard was mature My son said that my trousers were outlandish My daughter said that I reminded her of Alladin’s gene I didn’t care, for I thought that my friend in the mirror Looked better than me And that my shadow looked younger than ever.
My friendship with my shadow grew Actually my shadow is forty five years old But I think I am looking much younger My shadow says that he can pass as twenty five He feels that he is much fitter and handsome People never comment on his desirability When I take the beating, he has his shadowy laugh
Yet I have started loving my dark trailer There are moments when I am all by myself. My moments of loss, deprivation and failure My moments of sadness, helplessness My moments of destitution and moments of lost love Come to haunt me, in the day and in the dark When my only companion is my shadow, silent and knowing
When I am drawn all inward, Musing on the unhappy episodes, Neglect that I got and the ones that I bestowed On kind souls who tried to help me When I faced the setting sun and waning Moon When I sighed with the first monsoon breeze I looked at my shadow and felt at home
There are still lonelier moments of my own When I find the world at the other end of the river When I find the Sun and the stars, the hills and vales The lakes and oceans, the men and women whom I loved All stand beyond the horizon When I find myself walking on the edge of the world I ruefully look behind to see my benign shadow trailing me.
I have found that the one whom I love most Other than myself is my shadow At times I feel that I and my shadow are one But I find the duality sweeter than the Single For he kicks me when I flounder And I feel that he is smarter than I I love my shadowy companion, only a little less than I do myself.
During the years I have gathered things in the world A house and things, a wife and children I have my fancies, which they call hobbies I have dandy clothes and fancy leather on my feet I have my books and velvety music I do pray to a Power, thanking Him for all that I have received, though I doubt if he ever cared
I also know what all know When I came, I was empty handed I cried when I saw that I was among people To reduce my sorrow and to find a reason for my arrival I toiled in the world and gathered all the junk and more I know and am sad that I will not be taking my earnings with me But I promise you that I won’t leave my shadow behind when I go.
Age is in the head, the leader tells me Think positive and enjoy life Let the age stand by and watch you Take life by the horn
Life is an attitude, he tells me Live for others by your heart And for self, use your head Life is a struggle and the fitter live
I listen to him in silence, He takes the silence for failure Failure to succeed, failure to make a mark The inability to overtake, to lead the lesser
I acknowledge his wise words The words are the mantra of success It is the sermon for the leaders The adrenalin for that brings up the rear
Yet, I am unable to follow him My head likes the words But my heart is silent, It is the silence of time, past and present.
I am living since the time I was born Each day is new and every night its end Every high had a low which would climb again Only,I wanted to be on a table land
I have worked, earned and loved I have gained, lost and have taken I have given, asked and borrowed I have retuned, but have too many of them left.
Let me live till I return all my dues Let me age each day with the sun Let me breathe till the very end Till I have paid my last benefactor
I have neither failed nor succeeded I have never led, but I have not let Too many toil for me I will live my life slow and in the middle
I have lived for others by the heart The same heart rules my own life My head is only a tool of my heart It runs the show that the heart loves
I have not been able to make my head rule the heart How can the device train the maker? Have you heard of the cart pulling the horse? Nor can you make the oceans flow into rivers.
I am glad to have loved I loved when I was very young I love even today, only I am not sure whom I love I will not say that none loved me.
I loved You every moment, every second With each breath I loved You I saw You in the sky and the mountains I found You on the endless pathways
With each of these moments I know I have aged Few things get better with age Body is definitely not one of these My love for You grows sweeter each year
I know that You have not told me that You love me The passing moments make me old and it will be late One day I will be gone to far off lands But don’t fret that You failed to air your love
For I have ever known that You love me In the hot summers and cold winters In the stormy nights and the bright Spring I have seen your love for me and heard it loud as well
In the guiltless smile of my child In the silent prayer of the wayfarer In the blessings of the alms seeker I have found Your love for me
And I am aging all these days I am not leading anybody I am not a blind follower as well I am a silent lover, living the way my heart leads me
I send a silent prayer for the leader Each can find joy in his own way Many use their heart and some their head But the loser is not always lead by his heart
We are all looking for love. We all want to be loved. We want someone to come and say that he/she loves me. And we hope to find the ultimate joy here. And we err. We err more and more.
We write loftily in blogs. We do wonderful cut /paste as well. We post our photographs with hair covering one of our eyes. We make our lips look as juicy as possible. Then we say that we want to meet true honest people. No cheating please.
We portray ourselves as bold and beautiful. We portray ourselves as naughty too. We are too busy to reply everyone. Or we don’t get any reply from anyone. We are fair complexioned/tall/153cm/married/divorced/single/separated/prefer not to say. We advise people on things. We put questions to be answered by everyone. We want to show that we are clever.
Someone says you are beautiful. Someone says that you are romantic. You are on cloud nine. You write to him/her. You may even meet. What happens? Only a few months will tell you. It is the same story.
We do not love enough. We do not deserve enough. We live in the wells. We do not know the outer world. We claim to be independent. But only as much as it suits us.
Then there are the good ones too. The kind/nature loving/gardening/ simple/vegetarian/faithful/humble/straightforward/family loving/….. and what happens? He / she does not have time to continue the friendship. Busy/too busy. Yes, love ought to come through the door that I keep open. Love ought to be within the pen I have designed.
Love couldn’t care less.
We are all looking for love. We all want to be loved. We want someone to come and say that he/she loves me. And we hope to find the ultimate joy here. And we err. We err more and more.
My friends, all of us know that what we want is unlimited love. Love that is omnipresent. Love that would never drain out. What we want is an eternal love season where there would be spring, summer autumn and winter, but only with moderations. We have built our little pens where we would limit our love which we expect to be unlimited!!!!!!!
Can we succeed?
You know the answer. You can blame me. You can curse me. You can accuse me of painting a grim picture of things which you feel that is encouraging. No, my friends, all I want to tell you is that we are all shooting in the dark. Be sure that you would hit nowhere.
I am no student. I am no teacher either. I am no God. I am no preacher either. I am just myself. Just like you. I too am with you. I too err. I too do long. I too want to be loved.
But I have looked back. To see the rotten trail that I have left. How can love come hither?
I know few things which I fail to implement fully. Just because of my own limitations.
To find love, you have to love. Love does not care for your half hidden photographs or reduced age. Love does not care for your readerships or your cut/paste. Can you undo all your limitations? Can you say that you would love someone who would love you?
Just try and see what you get.
You get scared that you would bite more than you can chew?
Ah! I get you. You want no trouble as well? Playing it safe? Forget it friend. If you are looking for true love you wouldn’t be here in the first place. Now that you are here, let us be honest at least.
Undo the limitations and conditions. That will help you. You may meet someone.
I have found that the one whom I love most Other than myself is my shadow At times I feel that I and my shadow are one But I find the duality sweeter than the Single For he kicks me when I flounder And I feel that he is smarter than I I love my shadowy companion, only a little less than I do myself.
During the years I have gathered things in the world A house and things, a wife and children I have my fancies, which they call hobbies I have dandy clothes and fancy leather on my feet I have my books and feathery music I do pray to a Power, thanking Him for all that I have received, though I doubt if he ever cared
I also know what all know When I came, I was empty handed I cried when I saw that I was among people To reduce my sorrow and to find a reason for my arrival I toiled in the world and gathered all the junk and more I know and am sad that I will not be taking my earnings with me But I promise you that I won’t leave my shadow behind when I go.
My heart longed for the pleasures But deep inside I know that my pleasures and pains Are one.
They are as much a single Entity as much as the Moon is For, when the Moon is in full bloom His other half is full dark
Yet, the Moon has ever gone his Singular way, Waxing and waning From the fullest glory To the darkest nights
And I have learnt to live with my pain I am indeed in love with my pain For, my saddest day is the brink From where I can only see the homing joys
And my happiest day is the harbinger Of sad things and dark hours ahead Pleasures and pain live together Without one, I would never know the other
I would love to love I would be glad to here someone say, That I am beautiful But I know that I have my faults
If you say that I am beautiful With all my faults, then I know you love me But, then I have to deserve this love.
It so happens that this love does not Visit me quite often Last time when she knocked my door I was fast asleep
Ever since, I have searched for love I have assumed that My deprivation is my pain I have been deprived of love
I have suffered this pain for long Today I am loving my pain Today I know that a single drop of pain is nectar, And two of them is poison
Why should I always go for the poison And suffer more I have gone for the lesser And I have been happy ever since
My pain has taught me many things Which I did not learn in my pleasure My heart never saw the beauty of the world In smaller things earlier
Today, I am more sensitive I do not trample on a fallen flower Nor do I shake off dew drops From a heavy bending grass
I am moved by the eternal music of the oceans And the silence of vast arid lands Mountains have always made me weep And this pain here is better than a thousand pleasures
I have bent over tiny flowers Which I failed to see earlier I have watched the procession of ants in silence And have wondered if they thought about me
Often my heart wept When the evening lamp is lit And all that dispersed the pervading Darkness is only a tiny flame
I never felt this pain earlier I am glad that I have learnt to weep A Man does not weep they say True, but he can weep at smaller things.
Do you love me? She had asked long ago She did not say how much she loved me She need not have
I was a bigger fool In those days of sunshine I walked with a lofty gait And thought that I was smart
And I did not answer her She waited for me for long But I did not return I did not want to return to her
And many days have dawned since then And long nights have Covered my wakefulness And the years have galloped
And I have known what I have missed From the beginning I have missed love I have been all alone all through
I thought I was planning my life In the big city with a good job Making money and busy I was busy, too busy to look back
But then She was always there When I woke up in the middle of many nights For a glass of water I always saw her
Not that I loved her much then Not that I longed for her now Not that I wanted to begin again I knew I would have loved her
I have learned in the long years That love is not showered on boulders Love is given to those who deserve And perhaps I deserved in those days.
And then I did not know mine own worth All I thought was to get more comfort In planning my future I trampled upon my beautiful present
I am telling you my tale Not to gain any love from you I have stopped searching for love This is to make you look inside
To find why you failed if you did And what are you looking for here among strangers Can you find love again if you lost it once? Love comes in different shapes at different times
And It will never come back the way you long for it It will come to you when you most deserve it Nothing will make the flowers bloom When you look and say ‘now!’
Have you ever looked upon a sleeping child? With his eyes shut and a little smile on his lips? His teddy still in his tiny hands The child sleeps like a God.
And have you not fallen in love with such a child? I bet you did. What did you want from him? Love? A few kisses? You would like both. But you loved him for being himself.
You just loved him Because he was so lovable. Love will come to you the same way. When you are asleep with a smile on your lips.
