"Sometimes your nearness takes my breath away; and all the things I want to say can find no voice. Then, in silence, I can only hope my eyes will speak my heart." Robert Sexton
Dec 1, 2008 6:10 pm Mood: in awe of your beauty, 58 Views
If you look up into the early evening sky you will see a beautiful sight .. the current alignment between Jupiter, Venus and the Moon. The dates of the closest alignment are Sunday and Monday (Nov 30 and Dec 1). Look to the southwest shortly after sunset to observe Venus passing beneath Jupiter. Venus and Jupiter are currently approximately 40 degrees ahead of the Sun which is getting ready to make it's yearly alignment with the heart of our galaxy (Winter Solstice Dec 21).
On December 29, the New Moon is aligned with Pluto making it's final transition from Sagittarius to Capricorn. The Moon carries the pulse of Pluto's regenerative energy, bringing our attention to how we presently tread upon our journey through life. What light and abundance do we carry? Every step we take potentially magnifies our blessedness. This alignment asks us to be mindful of all we amplify with our Walk in Beauty.
Blessings for your Journey Tony McGettigan Shamanic Astronomer
Nov 20, 2008 7:40 pm Mood: a road less travelled, 100 Views
Is it just me .. or has anyone else noticed the direction my thoughts have been taking this last little while? I suppose that's what happens when your inspiration dries up like the Antarctica Ice Shelf ... gradually melting away under a Greenhouse sun.
I have no logical way to explain it - but looking back through my last few posts it appears as though I've become lost somewhere between 1980 and 1989. I guess it's not really that surprising when you rely on a faulty GPS and a time machine put together with a 2 dollar hammer and some nails purchased from the Home Depot.
Stuck in the 80's. Well like it or not, I know of far worse fates one could contemplate.
Yeah .. those were the times weren't they? Seems like life was so much more simpler then. Days were carefree .. uncomplicated - and dare I say it .. darn right fun! After all, 9/11 was still so far away, gas prices were easily affordable, the global economy wasn't falling apart at the seams (well maybe in Alberta - think Oil bust here. But then that's hardly global now is it?) And terrorism hadn't yet become a household word. We were all a little happier, a little more open and a lot more trusting of our fellow human beings. And my greatest heartbreak was still another 26 years (give or take a few) in the future .. and I sailed along, blissfully unaware of the impact it was going to have on my life to come.
There's absolutely no doubt about it .. compared to today the 80's were a piece of cake. A time of innocence and unbridled enthusiasm where living in the moment was the easiest thing in the world to do.
The easiest thing in the world ......
Well I just called the local garage (damn I forgot this old brick phone doesn't have the greatest range ... but I guess Virgin Mobile is still a little while off). They don't know when they can get a mechanic out here to fix the GPS - can you imagine? The guy who answered the phone just laughed when I told him I was visiting from the year 2008 and my time machine had broken down. The nerve of some people!
In the meantime (and in between time) - I think I'll leave you with a little taste of Alison Moyet. Just another long forgotten gem from the days of leg warmers and mullets.
Take care everyone .. and don't miss me too much!
I'll try not to be gone too long.
Invisible I feel like I'm invisible You treat me like I'm not really there And you don't really care I know this romance It aint going nowhere
You've got me so confused And there's words I could use But I'm afraid to say them I feel I've been had and I'm Boiling mad Still I can't live without you You don't have the time And you won't spend a dime Not even to call me Oh you don't know I exist And I wouldn't be missed If I had the nerve to quit you
Invisible I feel like I'm invisible You treat me like I'm not really there And you don't really care I know this romance It aint going nowhere
Invisible Just like my love You treat me like I'm invisible When you get the need to flirt You do the work You just don't care How much it hurts
I can never reach you on the phone It rings and rings But I know you're home It may be naive but I just want to believe I'm the only one I tell myself lies and give you alibis Knowing your promises You'll never keep Like a merry-go-round I'm going up, going down I'm on a dead end street
Invisible Just like your love I feel like I'm invisible You treat me like I'm not really there And you don't really care I know this romance It aint going nowhere
Although I know it's not a lot Don't want to lose What little we got I keep hanging on knowing I can't win Cause it's too hard to start over again
Invisible I feel like I'm invisible You treat me like I'm not really there And you don't really care I know this romance It aint going nowhere
Invisible Just like your love You treat me like I'm invisible When you get the need to flirt You do the work You just don't care How much it hurts
Invisible Just like your love I feel like I'm invisible You treat me like I'm not really there And you don't really care
Oh my dearest friend, the time has been too long since I've been able to write to you. My life now seems like it has always been this way. I am so very happy at last.
Please .. tell the one who is so special that my sweet love never went away.
The first time I saw you Oh, you looked so fine And I had a feeling One day you'd be mine Honey you came along and captured my heart Now my love is somewhere lost in your kiss When I'm all alone its you that I miss Girl a love like yours is hard to resist Oh, oh, ooh, ooh, oh
Penny lover, my loves on fire Penny lover, you're my one desire Tell me baby could this be true That I could need someone like I need you
Nights warm and tender Lying next to you Girl I surrender What more can I do Ive spent all of my life in search of your love Now there's one more thing I'd like to say Don't you ever take your sweet love away Girl I'll do anything, just please stay Oh, oh, ooh, ooh, oh
I dont understand it, oh what's come over me But I'm not gonna worry, no not anymore Cause when a man's in love, he's only got one story That's why my love is somewhere lost in your kiss When I'm lost and alone it's you that I miss With a love like yours, it's hard to resist Oh, oh, ooh, ooh, oh
Penny lover, don't you walk on by (don't you walk on by) Penny lover, don't you make me cry (don't you make me cry baby) Penny lover, don't you walk on by (don't you walk on by) Penny lover, don't you make me cry (oh penny baby) Penny lover, don't you walk on by (don't you walk on by)
I remember the first time I saw you baby Penny lover, don't you make me cry You had the look in your eye, you had the look in your eye, Yeah, yeah Ooh pretty baby I just wanted to reach out and touch you baby Just want to reach out and hold ya, I want to reach out and say Ooh, ooh Don't make me cry I wanna talk about you everyday (penny lover) Need you, need you baby
As the last of the candles burn away, darkness fills the room.
I've memorized every last detail of your face, imagining what it would have been like to be yours. How it would have felt to have been loved by you .. even if just for a little while.
The pictures I can't put away. As hard as I try I'm just not that strong. You are so beautiful to my eyes ash .. and I can't remember a time when I didn't want to be your wife. In reality, I know it's not possible .. but in my heart, where you will always be - I'm all that to you and more.
And even though I had to let you go, I want you to know .. that I'm still in love with you.
Maybe I don't say the words Maybe I don't do the right thing Cause here I am sittin' by myself And there's too much room in this empty space Gotta fill it up No matter where I go Or what I do I'm still in love with you
Maybe I'm just a stubborn guy And maybe I have tried to shut you out Go around hiding cause I think I'm trapped Like a frightened child, I want to run to you yeah Crawl into your lap No matter where I go, or what I do Still in love with you
As I carve these words into a stone Cause I don't give a damn what the critics heed Yeah, there's a candle burnin through the winter snow And I want you to know That I'm hearing you girl I want you to know That I realize What I have
Maybe I leave the lights on too long And maybe I've forgotten all those birthday cards Every little one But I know what's deep inside of me Oh Eurasian eyes Callin out to me No matter where we go, or what we do Still in love with you
Yeah No matter where we go, or what we do Still in love with you
Nov 9, 2008 9:14 pm Mood: musical interlude, 151 Views
It's always been my belief that in many ways music has served not only to shape and define the most intimate and memorable moments of my life, but also to lend them a richness of color and depth that I don't think would have existed otherwise. When it comes right down to it, music has always been a friend to me, a constant companion with a soothing touch when my life threatened to spiral out of control, coming apart at the seams.
Music was there the day I lost my first love, wrapping me in a comforting embrace and showing me that there WAS life after a broken heart. And that no matter how bad I was feeling at the time, I didn't have to look far to find someone who had it worse. It gave me hope that eventually the pain would end and I would find the strength and courage to breathe again.
Music was there giving me support and encouragement when I needed it most. Music showed me how to laugh at myself and not let the pressures of life steal the sweetest moments. How to follow my own path and carve out something that was uniquely my own. In fact music was there the whole way, to cheer me on as I worked towards shaping my own destiny - and achieving a lifetime of lofty goals.
Thinking back on it now I can honestly say that I still remember the songs that were topping the charts the day that each of my children were born. The song I danced to at my wedding. The song that got me through a multitude of broken hearts. And the song that ultimately defined me as a woman.
Why not stop now and just take a moment to search carefully back through your own box of memories? I'm sure you can find one of those special moments of your own. One that just stands out so vividly in your mind. And if you think about it long enough ... I know you'll find ... that almost without exception - there's also a song that goes with it!
This one is on my iPod right now. In fact it's been playing in my own personal collection for most of the summer. And because it brings back such great memories from the last 3 years of my life, it's become my #1 for the summer of 2008. The one that will echo in my memory years from now when I think back and marvel at what a ride it's been - and just how much my life has changed since the year began.
As I close my eyes and drift away to the beautiful sounds of the Cranberries and Linger - one thought keeps coming to mind. When all is said and done - I've lived my life with no regrets. And if I were given the chance to go back in time and do it all over again (make any changes I wanted to make) ... I know beyond a shadow of a doubt - that I wouldn't change a thing!
After all, it's because of these life lessons that I am now the unique and beautiful person you see before you today! And of course like a faithful companion .. standing by me every step of the way - is the sweetest of music. My dance partner extraordinaire - spinning a rich tapestry of color through my memories and providing the intricate and unforgettable ... soundtrack to my life.
If you, If you could return, don't let it burn, don't let it fade I'm sure I'm not being rude, but it's just your attitude It's tearing me apart, it's ruining everything
I swore, I swore I would be true, And honey, so did you So why were you holding her hand? Is that the way we stand? Were you lying all the time? Was it just a game to you?
But I'm in so deep You know I'm such a fool for you You got me wrapped around your finger Ah, ha, ha Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to Do you have to let it linger?
Oh, I thought the world of you I thought nothing could go wrong But I was wrong, I was wrong If you, if you could get by Trying not to lie Things wouldn't be so confused And I wouldn't feel so used But you always really knew I just wanna be with you
But I'm in so deep You know I'm such a fool for you You got me wrapped around your finger Ah, ha, ha Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to Do you have to let it linger?
But I'm in so deep You know I'm such a fool for you You got me wrapped around your finger Ah, ha, ha Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to Do you have to let it linger?
You know I'm such a fool for you You got me wrapped around your finger Ah, ha, ha Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to Do you have to let it linger?
Oct 20, 2008 9:30 pm Mood: How much I love you, 215 Views
"I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One." Seth, City of Angels
And I'd give up forever to touch you Cause I know that you feel me somehow You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment And all I can breathe is your life Cause sooner or later it's over I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming Or the moment of truth in your lies When everything feels like the movies Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am I just want you to know who I am
Oct 14, 2008 10:00 pm Mood: under the Devil's spell, 323 Views
Cast your spell to hold me tight And bind me to you through the night As fires burn within your eyes They brand my soul with wicked lies
Surrender up the love you keep Then hold me tight before I sleep Before too long the darkness screams You've become the Devil of my dreams
In the cool of the evening When everything is gettin' kind of groovy I call you up and ask you If you'd like to go with me and see a movie First you say no, you've got some plans for the night And then you stop and say, all right
Love is kind of crazy with a spooky little boy like you
You always keep me guessin I never seem to know what you are thinkin' And if a girl looks at you It's for sure your little eye will be a-winkin' I get confused cause I don't know where I stand And then you smile and hold my hand
Love is kind of crazy with a spooky little boy like you Spooky
If you decide some day to stop this little game that you are playin' I'm gonna tell you all the things my hearts been a-dyin' to be sayin' Just like a ghost you've been a-hauntin' my dreams So I proposed on Halloween
Love is kind of crazy with a spooky little boy like you Spooky
Spooky Oh oh all right I said Spooky Oh ohhhh Yeah,Yeah I said Spooky Yeah, yeah, yeah
Oct 9, 2008 10:14 am Mood: your email wingman, 328 Views
I think this is a fantastic idea! Thanks Gmale. Now if you could only make a version for my Hottie Male I'd be set!!!
SEATTLE - Here's the scenario: It's Friday night, and what began as an innocent happy-hour margarita morphed into a few pitchers. After all, those tacos were salty.
Bidding friends adieu, you jump in a cab, head home and decide a quick email check is in order. And there it is: a message from your ex. Or your boss. Or that friend you're secretly mad at.
If you're the kind of person who types tipsy and regrets it in the morning, Google's "Mail Goggles," a new test-phase feature in the free Gmail service, might save you some angst.
The Goggles can kick in late at night on weekends. The feature requires you to solve a few easy math problems in short order before hitting "send." If your logical thinking skills are intact, Google is betting you're sober enough to work out the repercussions of sending that screed you just drafted.
And if you can't multiply two times five, you'll probably thank Google in the morning.
To activate Goggles, Gmail users should click the "Settings" link at the top of a Gmail page, then go to the "Labs" section.
There's no shame in admitting that sometimes you need a little extra help. Gmail engineer Jon Perlow designed Goggles with his own weaknesses in mind.
"Sometimes I send messages I shouldn't send. Like the time I told that girl I had a crush on her over text message. Or the time I sent that late night email to my ex-girlfriend that we should get back together," he wrote when announcing Mail Goggles on a company blog.
The name is derived from the slang term "beer goggles," or the curious effect of alcohol on one's ability to see the true nature of that "cutie" at the other end of the bar.
But you can set up Mail Goggles to protect you from yourself at other emotionally vulnerable times - before your morning coffee, for example, or right after "Grey's Anatomy."
Oct 7, 2008 9:17 pm Mood: a trip down memory lane, 437 Views
Do you ever forget the first time (and I mean the first REAL time) you fall in love with someone?
I'm not talking here about the countless infatuations we all have at some point in our lives (like the high school crush we had on the girl/guy who shared the locker right next to ours, or the movie star we idolized when we were 13 and told all our friends we were going to marry when we were older - except for me it wasn't a Hollywood star but rather the entire Senior Hockey Team!
And I also don't mean those moments of lust or extreme puppy love that felt more like something we experience in first grade - even though we're now 19 and studying Business Law in University.
No, what I'm talking about is the kind of love that mere words could never describe. The kind that takes root so deep within - that you know without question .. without a shadow of a doubt - that you would sell your soul to the Devil if only you could guarantee their eternal happiness. That from this moment on they would never have to experience even a second of pain - and that when they looked into your eyes ... oh yeah you guessed it - all they would see is forever. That's the kind of love I'm talking about - the unbreakable kind. The kind that moves mountains, builds monuments and launches a thousand ships. The kind that inspires poets, gives birth to dreamers and puts even the most magnificent of Heaven's stars to shame.
In short, the kind of love that takes your breath away!
Have you ever been in love You could touch the moonlight When your heart is shooting stars You're holding heaven in your arms Have you ever been so in love
Have you ever walked on air Ever felt like you were dreaming When you never thought it could But it really feels that good Have you ever been so in love
The time I spent Waiting for something that was Heaven sent When you find it don't let go I know
Have you ever said a prayer And found that it was answered All my hope has been restored And I'm not looking anymore Have you ever been so in love
Some place that you ain't leavin' Somewhere you're gonna stay When you finally found the meanin' Have you ever felt this way
Have you ever been in love You could touch the moonlight When your heart is shooting stars You're holding Heaven in your arms Have you ever been so in love
Oct 1, 2008 8:32 pm Mood: what you don't see, 434 Views
"...love is something you can't describe, like the look of a rose, the smell of the rain, or the feeling of forever."
Why is it that I feel the need to hide so much from you? When you're close .. why do I feel I have to be strong?
Why am I afraid to be myself in your presence .. that emotional girl who would do just about anything for you? And why am I so scared to let down my guard and tell you what's here in my heart? To let you know that after all these years .. I'm still in love with you.
There's a part of me that wants to dive in and write you an email this very second, throwing my insecurities to the wind and saying look .. this is me and this is how I feel - and why .. WHY, can't you just feel the same way about me? Because beneath the surface I know that you would brush it off and dismiss it as frivolous and inconsequential.
So here I am, ever the master of deceit .. putting on the brave front - and lying to you until it becomes as natural as breathing. But is it you I'm trying to convince, or myself when I tell you that I'm not missing you so much it's killing me inside?
And I have to pretend that I'm happy only writing to you once every 2 or 3 months .. and that I can get by with only a small piece of you, when all I really want is everything.
Can I say that the pictures you sent me were incredible? There are no words that even come close to describing how beautiful you are .. and what seeing you this way has done to me.
And I hate myself for being weak .. because you know I've fallen in love with you all over again.
Although each one is special, my favorite is the one with you on the bridge, the sun dappled Sea in the background. I look at it and all I can do is imagine that I'm there with you .. laughing as you put your arms around me, pulling me close .. the essence of you burning like wildfire against my skin. The very thought makes my knees go weak. And I wonder what it would be like to kiss you.
I can't tell you how I've been thinking about you almost every minute of the day - and how I can feel you in the very air I breathe.
I can't tell you that I miss you and I want you, and I love you so deeply it hurts. I can't tell you because then you would know .. and you would call me weak. But how could you not see it? I couldn't even wait more than 24 hours to write back to you.
And I want to appear disinterested .. and I want you to think that I don't really care ... and that when you're gone I don't ache inside .. and that one day without you doesn't feel like a lifetime spent in exile.
But these are the things I hide ..
Seems somebody put out the moon Now the road is a minefield I can't follow the way he moves I can't see past the shadows
You make the darkness disappear I feel found when you stay near I know where I am when you are here My way becomes so clear
When you're gone Will I lose control? You're the only road I know You show me where to go Who will drive my soul?
Seems somebody burned out the signs I can't expect the hard curves There's no borders, there are no lines How can I know where to turn?
You make the streetlights reappear I feel bright when you stand near I know what I am when you are here My place becomes so clear
When you're gone Will I lose control? You're the only road I know You show me where to go Who will drive my soul?
Will I lose control? You're the only road I know You show me where to go Who will drive my soul? Drive my soul
When you're gone Will I lose control? You're the only road I know You show me where to go
When you're gone Will I lose control? You're the only road I know You show me where to go Who will drive my soul?
