10 Reasons why Making Love is good, he, he(other than the obvious of course) Nov 26, 2007 5:13 pm Mood: informational, like those arti, 1115 Views Disclaimer: Since IFFers are apparently all in kindergarton some words had to be changed to protect the faint of heart. (the prudes, rather) 1. Making Love helps you forget Oxytocin, which triggers the BIG O , has an amnesic effect that lasts up to five hours. So for a period of time you forget that he maxed out your Visa card or she was an hour late getting home from work. Women get an additional benefit. During "The Big O" parts of the brain that govern fear, anxiety, and stress are switched off. (Faking the Big O gives no such benefit.) 2. Heightened sense of smell After making love, production of prolactin surges, causing stem cells in the brain to develop new neurons in the brain’s smell center (olfactory bulb). 3. Weight loss Rambunctious fornication burns a minimum of two hundred calories, about the same as running fifteen minutes on a treadmill. British researchers determined that the equivalent of six Big Macs can be worked off by making love three times a week for a year. 4. Healthier heart Women who "do it" more have higher levels of estrogen, which protects against heart disease. 5. Cure for the common cold Once-a-week fornicating () produces 30 percent higher levels of immunoglobulin A, which boosts the immune system. 6. Better bladder control "Doing it" strengthens the pelvic muscles that control the flow of urine. 7. Relief for a stuffy nose Really. "Doing it" is a natural antihistamine. It can even help combat hay fever and asthma. 8. Boosts immune system Endorphins stimulate immune-system cells that fight disease. 9. Protection against Alzheimer’s and osteoporosis Women who "Do IT" more have higher levels of estrogen, which protects against Alzheimer’s and osteoporosis. Which is odd considering reason #1, i thought it helped u forget, hmmmmmm 10. "Making Love, or Doing IT" Can Cure Headaches A South Illinois School Of Medicine study on 52 migraine sufferers reported that 16 experienced considerable relief after the Big O and another eight had their headaches completely gone. So guys next time she says she doesn't want to cause she has a headache, throw this one at her." So to make a long story short, as Nike said.."Just do it", repeat after me, "S-X is good, S-X is fun, S-X can help me live a longer, happier life" LOL, 4 Comments

Does Evil Exist? Nov 22, 2007 9:00 am 1257 Views This has a thought provoking message no matter how you believe. Does evil exist? The university professor challenged his students with this question. Did God create everything that exists? A student bravely replied yes, he did!" "God created everything?" The professor asked. "Yes, sir," the student replied. The professor answered, "If God created everything, then God created evil since evil exists, and according to the principal that our works define who we are then God is evil." The student became quiet before such an answer. The professor was quite pleased with himself and boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was a myth. Another student raised his hand and said, "Can I ask you a question professor?" "Of course", replied the professor. The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?" "What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never been cold?" The students snickered at the young man's question. The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat. Everybody and every object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (- 460 degrees F) is the total absence of heat; all matter becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we have too little heat. The student continued. "Professor, does darkness exist?" The professor responded, "Of course it does". The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact we can use Newton's prism to break white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe what happens when there is no light present." Finally the young man asked the professor. "Sir, does evil exist?" Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course as I have already said. We see it every day. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. "These manifestations are nothing else but evil." To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is not like faith, or love, that exist just as does light and heat. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light." The professor sat down. The young mans name --- Albert Einstein 14 Comments

Boxers or Briefs? Nov 22, 2007 6:56 am 1414 Views I LOVE this question. It’s like asking people if they prefer cats or dogs, Coke or Pepsi, Seinfeld or Frazier … top or bottom. For the record: Dogs, Sprite(lol), Seinfeld, top … OK, no wait, bottom … no, top … bottom! … TOP! … BOTTOM!! (Well, what the hell. That’s why we have coin flips.) So, OK. Boxers or briefs. It’s actually a more passionate debate than you think. The argument for boxers: They’re comfortable. In the same way your feet are more comfortable in house slippers than dress shoes. Not that feet have any rhyme or reason to be a part of this discussion, of course. They’re fashionably fun, with all sorts of cool designs. You certainly won’t see Spiderman slinging sticky stuff out of his wrists on tighty whiteys. No, really. Hee hee You guys could actually wear your boxers and a T-shirt to 7-Eleven at 2 in the morning to pick up the ingredients for a Root Beer Float on a muggy summer night and people will think you’re wearing swim trunks. Girls dig them. Pretty much the only reason most guys need, frankly. Am i right, guys? The argument for briefs: You wouldn’t want to jog without briefs — for the same self-supporting reason us women don’t jog without a bra. (Although, you probably really wish we'd rethink that.) Tighter fits … good for showing off slim waists, six-pack abs and — ahem — amorous intentions Less scrotum wobble. Less adjusting on the fly. boxers---room to roam Briefs----function over fashion Comando--------no undies for me Bikini Thong--------for men worried about their panties lines showing, lol Other 5 Comments , 7 votes

kahlil Gibran, Nov 19, 2007 5:59 pm 1299 Views Those who know me know i love poetry and philosophy. It has a way of making you look at the world differently, through the eyes of someone else. It makes u look beyond urself, keeps the mind fresh and always open. Kahlil is a brilliant poet, i love his mind. I will always be thankful to that waiter in a small cafe in Salt Lake city who introduced me to his work. Anyway below are a few of his quotes, hope you like them but more importantly i hope u leave with a new perspective. ENJOY!!!! "The deeper sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain." "A friend who is far away is sometimes much nearer than one who is at hand. Is not the mountain far more awe-inspiring and more clearly visible to one passing through the valley than to those who inhabit the mountain?" "The optomist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose." "In battling evil, excess is good; for he who is moderate in announcing the truth is presenting half-truth. He conceals the other half out of fear of the people's wrath." "A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle." "All our words are but crumbs that fall down from the feast of the mind." "An eye for an eye, and the whole world would be blind." "And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair." "Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror." "But let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls." "Coming generations will learn equality from poverty, and love from woes." "Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother." "Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation." "Exaggeration is truth that has lost its temper." "Faith is a knowledge within the heart, beyond the reach of proof." "Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity." "Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need." "I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers." "Love possesses not nor will it be possessed, for love is sufficient unto love." "Most people who ask for advice from others have already resolved to act as it pleases them." "Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars." "The teacher who is indeed wise does not bid you to enter the house of his wisdom but rather leads you to the threshold of your mind." "To understand the heart and mind of a person, look not at what he has already achieved, but at what he aspires to." "When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight." "Wisdom ceases to be wisdom when it becomes too proud to weep, too grave to laugh, and too selfish to seek other than itself." "You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give." "You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might also pray in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance." "Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens." "Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding." 12 Comments

Why do we seek to hurt others? Nov 17, 2007 7:30 am 1186 Views We all are stuck here together, all trying to get our hands on some small portion of goodness, love and hapiness that exists. It must exist, at least my heart believes it does. So why do we seek to hurt others, why is it so hard for man to see that when u lift another above yourself they will be compelled to turn back and lift u as well. Life is not a race to see who finishes first. I see no finish line, just a destination. ....is anyone listening,....or have my ramblings fallen on deaf ears? 9 Comments

Heart 4 Sale........... Nov 17, 2007 7:12 am 1218 Views Come one, come all heart 4 sale it's bruised and trampled but big and warm Too much for this sensitive soul to handle It has it's faults, can't be trusted, falls too quickly, has difficulty getting back up but it's kind and gentle and just wants to be loved It's not for me don't know how to care for it am too carefree maybe nymphs should never be given hearts for i can't/won't/don't know how to protect it So mine is for sale, don't want it anymore Come one, come all Heart 4 sale 6 Comments

YOU DON'T KNOW JACK SCHITT!! Nov 16, 2007 7:46 pm 926 Views YOU DON'T KNOW JACK SCHITT!! Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says: "You don't know Jack Schitt."Now you can intellectually handle the situation: Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The Deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents objection, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.After being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were still living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Shitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens Wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Daawg, Byrd, Hoarse and Bull. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. So now when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt", You can correct them! "Listen not only do I know him I know his whole family" 0 Comments

Life's Unanswered Questions Nov 16, 2007 7:40 pm Mood: uuhhhhhhhh?????//, 1085 Views Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the car-pool lane? Can you cry under water? If a man alone in the woods said something would a woman still say he was wrong? If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? If humans evolved from monkey's/apes, why are they still here? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Do penguins have knees? Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on? If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk? If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy? Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts? You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them? Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are? Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :'Caution: May Cause Drowsiness? Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Why are red buttons always the most important? How's come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up. If marbles are not made of marble, why are they called marbles? How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves? Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them? Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one? Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"? 2 Comments

Tribute to Hobbsy Nov 14, 2007 4:29 am Mood: giggly, 1429 Views My favorite comic strip Calvin and Hobbes. Always bring a smile to my face, a giggle to my ears and occasionally a tear to my eye (for laughing too hard) lol. Just a few lines of Wisdom from the pair. Enjoy a chuckle on me. "If something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway." "Who wouldn't be interested in everything we do?!" "You know what we need, Hobbes? We need an attitude." "You know you'll hate something when they won't tell you what it is." "I flunked a test today, but I don't mind." "It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept." "The world isn't fair, Calvin." "I know, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?" "I've been thinking, Hobbes." "On a weekend?" "Well, it wasn't on purpose...." "As a math atheist, I should be excused from this." "This one's tricky. You have to use imaginary numbers, like eleventeen ..." "I don't need to study! I don't need to learn!" "I can always get by on my good looks and charm!" "Homework, I command thee, BE DONE!" "Childhood is short and maturity is forever." "Somehow I imagined this experience would be more rewarding." "I'd explain it, but there's a lot of math." "OK, so I was wrong for once in my life! Shut up." "I've got to start listening to those quiet, nagging doubts." "Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him?" "You can present the material, but you can't make me care." "From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way." "It's that moment of dawning comprehension I live for." I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life...procrastinating and rationalizing." *"Reality continues to ruin my life." "I liked things better when I didn't understand them." 10 Comments

Proclamation on the Family Nov 12, 2007 4:10 pm Mood: contemplative, 1007 Views Had an interesting discussion in the lobby few days back on marriage and family. A lot of strong opinions on ths subject. I truly love this world we live in with the vast differences in culture and peoples. We have so many differences that make the world an interesting place but what i love also are the many similarities that we all share. One of those is family and friendship. This proclamation was issued by my faith, "The church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints" (mormons) and contains principles that i feel are vital to the happiness and well-being of every family. Just curious what other's take is on all this marriage/family business. Anyway would love ur comments, good or bad. I truly believe that many of the problems in the world today would be solved by bringing the focus back to the nurturing of the family unit. “We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children. “All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose. ... “We declare the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God’s eternal plan. “Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. ‘Children are an heritage of the Lord’ (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations. “The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed. ... 1 comment

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